"If your head tells you one thing, and your heart tells you another, before you do anything, you should first decide whether you have a better head or a better heart."
Damn. I am in no position to act rashly. But this quote really made me think.
I hate a certain group. All of them. All who are like them and does the same thing they do. I will do everything to oppose them, and at the same time hope they will come to realize that what they're doing requires more intellect and breeding. I despise them, and it will never change.
I like a certain person. He is really someone I can talk to. He gives great advices, he makes me laugh. I really loved spending time with him, although during those moments, we can't see each other. We talk, but I can't see him and he can't see me as well. Our roads crossed for three times already. I really counted those days as rare ones since I won't be able to say when will I see him again. I can see him, but my pride keeps me from doing it. Bottomline is I like the person I see in him. He is really different from all the others. The certain reason why I like him.
Only to find out that he is really different from the others.
He belongs to the circle I hate. He is one of them. The moment he admitted to me that he is one of them, I can't speak. He never knew of my hatred against them, not a single idea. He is aware of my dreams changing the environment I live in, but nothing about opposition against them.
I keep telling myself that maybe he's different from them. They aren't really the same. Maybe he is the one who will stand out in that crowd, telling me that he isn't like them. That he won't do anything like them. But it didn't help. He really is like them. I saw it with my own eyes; encouraging others to be like him. Like them. I saw him in an act I really hated seeing for a long time.
Do I have a better head?
Will I continue my dreams of eliminating the "brainwashers of the innocent" just like I planned before? The vision of an institution with peace, and eventually a country possessing one? Must I disregard my feelings to continue this dream?
Or do I have a better heart?
Disregard his presence in the circle since I knew him before knowing his ideals. I liked him for who he was, not who he is.
But what will prevail? Can dreams change our hearts or can feelings change our dreams?
